Saturday, August 23, 2008


“Not sure”, “I’ll check with my staff”, & “Don’t know”:Won’t Cut It, John

(August 23, Stoma, DE) This past week John McCain revealed himself as the out of touch, befuddled, has been, he is. When asked by a reporter, how many homes he owns his reply was “I’m not sure...I don’t know...I’ll have to get my staff back to you on that.” He dose not know how many homes he and his wife own? That does not bode well for a man running for the presidency of the United States during extremely difficult economic times for the vast majority of voters.

The Brooding Cynyx research unit, in partnership with ASSPAC in Moss Point Mississippi, a BGE subsidiary, conducted an extensive investigation as to just how many times the 71 year old senator from Arizona answered a question, “I don’t know”, ‘I’m not sure”, “I’ll have my staff get back to you.” The results were as disturbing to the research team as they may be for you.


1. How many times have you been married?
2. How many cars have you wrecked in your life?
3. How many hemorrhoid surgeries have you had this century?
4. Is Puerto Rico a State?
5. How much Viagra do you consume a week?
6. Who is the president of Czechoslovakia?
7. Is Osama bin Laden a Shi’ite or a Sunni?
8. Where exactly are the gates of hell?
9. What is five plus eight?
10. How many states are there in the United States?


1. What is your mother’s maiden name?
2. How old is your wife?
3. Did you adopt a child?
4. What day is it?
5. How is the American economy doing?
6. What did you have for breakfast this morning?
7. When was the last time you had an original thought or idea?
8. What have you done as an Arizona senator for the past 24 years to secure your state’s southern border with Mexico?
9. Why did you destroy your credibility, reputation and soul to side with George W. Bush and his failed policies, particularly his misguided war in Iraq?
10. Do you ever eat squash or yams?

QUESTIONS ASKED OF JOHN McCAIN HE ANSWERED, “I’ll have to check with my staff.”

1. Where was your wife last night?
2. How many fingers do you have?
3. Do you realize just how far out of touch you are with most Americans who are really struggling to pay the bills?
4. How many servants do you employ in all your homes?
5. How many cartons of ‘DePends’ do you go through a week?
6. When was the last time you shaved yourself?
7. Did you ever have an affair with Larry Craig?
8. Who was the last man to have sexual relations with your wife?
9. Why do you feel you should be the next president of the United States?
10. Do you think your experience as a POW will influence your foreign policy if elected president?

Our research uncovered many other dubious answers to straightforward questions McCain has provided over the course of his 27 years in Congress. His is a long paper trail of comments, interviews, op-ed pieces, speeches and other material that, when analyzed over time and put in perspective, reveal a great deal about how McCain’s mind, or what’s left of it, works.

Some of the more illuminative Q&A’s were:

Reporter: “Senator, did you know John Keating was a criminal”
McCain: “ My friend, I do not judge others.”

Reporter: “Senator, did you divorce your first wife because she was horribly disfigured in a motor vehicle accident?”
McCain: “Maybe, my friend.”

Tom Brokaw: “Senator McCain, do you believe in and would you support legislation that would extend health insurance to the unemployed, illegal immigrants suffering from hyper flatulence?”
McCain: “My friend, that is the transcendent mission of this generation.”

Tim Russert: “ Senator, you have had a long career in the Congress, you are basically representative of an inept, do nothing Senate. How can you now campaign as a candidate for change?”
McCain: “ Fuck you , my friend, you fat, Irish drunk.”

Andrea Mitchell: “Senator, you have proposed keeping American troops in Iraq for 100 years if necessary. Why?”
McCain: “That’s for me to know and you to find out, my friend.”

Bob Hope: “Captain McCain, we all admire your strength and courage having been a POW for almost six years. How does it feel to be back on American soil?”
McCain: “I like rice, my friend.”

Jesse Jackson: “Senator, why did you vote against the legislation that made Martin Luther King’s birthday a federal holiday?”
McCain: “ My friend, I was in the Navy. He was a Negro.”

Sean Hannity: “Senator, have you ever had an abortion?”
McCain: “ Yabba dabba doo.”

Mike Wallace: “Senator, what is it like being married to a woman almost 30 years younger than you?”
McCain: “Busy, my friend, very, very busy.”

Chris Matthews: “ Senator, since you are here in Pennsylvania do you think, do you feel, do you sense that a conservative in a largely Catholic, blue collar , middle class state with an enormous Black population in Philadelphia, that maybe, you...or someone like you, even if you took Tom Ridge as your running mate the voters here to vote for you?”
McCain: “ Stop spitting on me! I’m having flashbacks, my friend.”

Copyright TBC 2008 © All Rights Reserved

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