Monday, June 2, 2008


From Iowa to South Dakota Via The Low Road

(June 2, Sioux Falls, SD) Two of the most unremarkable of our United States share a border not far from here. Iowa and South Dakota, the upper Midwest: bland, expansive and in this, the oddest of Presidential primary cycles, both serendipitously significant politically . These are not places one might view as all that significant for any particular reason at any time. Yet, by tomorrow night, the Democratic nominating process that began across the Missouri River in Iowa six months ago, may, in some way, be concluded on this equally nondescript side of that river.

From a vantage point along a two lane black top in South Dakota from which Iowa remains visible, the circle appears to be nearly complete. Early in what would turn out to be a particularly harsh winter in this region, Iowans caucused in January providing Senator Obama that initial impetus to get his campaign going. Not long afterwards,far from here, Mrs. Clinton wept and won the New Hampshire primary; she wept prior to winning so hers were not tears of joy, they were tears of frustration. Even before she wiped her eyes and blew her nose she knew, deep within, that the only road for her would be the lowest of low roads. Her campaign would leave New Hampshire to begin their trek along that low road as soon as they hit pavement in South Carolina.

Now, it all comes back to this neck of the woods. What an ocean of rhetoric and spite, dirty tactics, innuendo and thinly veiled racist, sexist, class warfare code words have flowed under bridges nationwide. Hill and Bill actually managed to burn a few bridges along the way.

At virtually every juncture Team Clinton chose to remain on the low road only to exit when access to a lower one presented itself. The Billary machine rumbled down a super highway of race baiting and trash talking taking no prisoners, avoiding the obstacles as reality, truth and facts had to be swerved around.

As reported by Anne E. Kornblut in the Washington Post today, “Asked what mistakes she has made in of the campaign and what lessons she has learned, Clinton demurred, saying, "Oh, I have not had time to think about that." “

Oh, all you’ve had is time to think about it, Mrs. Clinton. Staring at the ceilings of various hotel rooms across the country when sleep evaded you; while looking out the window of a campaign plane or bus and seeing nothing but the wispy remnants of your dreams float by: you surely had time to think. Clearly you and yours had ample time to think of more scenarios and spin, more arithmetical maneuvers that would help deliver you that which you so desperately sought. Haven’t had time to think about it Hillary?? Sure. All you probably do is think about IT. Where did IT go and why? How did this happen to ME. Who can I blame?

Hillary, you have thought of every way to spin reality and, most likely tonight, remain seething in petulant deep thought about how to swindle super delegates. First it was ”let the people speak at the ballot box”, now, it’s “all about the delegates”. The popular vote counts; no, actually , the popular vote doesn’t really matter. We have witnessed your head spin so easily and often you’ve made Linda Blair’s character in the Exorcist seem inflexible. Boy those Puerto Ricans gave you a reason to keep on keepin’ on didn’t they? Such a shame they don’t vote for real, isn’t it.

Whatever you once possessed as character, conscience or morals have long ago abandoned you (or you simply dropped the facade) and that has been made stunningly clear as this campaign has played out. It is now as pathetic as it is pleasurable to see you flop around in public like a goldfish suddenly tossed on a hardwood floor.

Think about Mark Penn much? Ever ponder why exactly you even gave jobs to hacks and flacks, has-been sleazy operatives like Harold Ickes, Howard Wolfson, chubby, stupid Kiki McClean and Lannie Davis? How about hubby Bill’s contributions to your cause? He sure did serve you well didn’t he. Yes, Bill, the“Comeback Id”, as Todd Purdam has dubbed him in the latest issue of Vanity Fair. Ever the adroit speaker,according to the Washington Post, Mr. Clinton commented calling the article "a tawdry, anonymous quote-filled attack piece" and "journalism of personal destruction at its worst". The Huffington Post quotes our loquacious former President referring to Mr. Purdam as, “sleazy,” “dishonest,” “slimy,” and a “scumbag.” After catching his breath, Bill continued, “There’s just five or six blatant lies in there,” though he admitted he hadn’t read the article. “He’s a real slimy guy.”

Even today, that brilliantly astute politician, always so finely tuned to the pulse of the public, so wise in his judgment and unmatched political acumen, your campaign’s national cochairman, Tom Vilsack, the hapless former Governor of Iowa, (who himself had run for the democratic presidential nomination for about 9 hours last year), has said, it’s over. If Tom Nutsack can read the writing on the wall the letters must be ten feet high in Day-Glo orange. Think about that. Speaking of eels like Vilsack jumping ship, how often do you think about Fast Eddie Rendell? Your Pennsylvania victory had as mush significance as whether the ground hog sees his shadow or not. You definitely will have some things to think about, Hillary and it is a fairly safe bet you have already spent time ruminating over these questions.

Think, that is probably all you do and you’ll have plenty more time on your hands very soon. You may want to start by figuring out how to pay your bills, your staffers and the countless small businesses across the country you owe money to. You might want to think about why it is that most of your Senate colleagues wouldn’t give you the time of day and may gloat just a bit upon your return.

It may be fitting that on this night, the eve of the last 2 primaries where we may actually finally be rid of Billary, the International Space Station received a new toilet delivered by the Space Shuttle. This goes to show that even in the vastness of space, there comes a point when people can no longer tolerate all the shit they have had to live with. Think about that.

Copyright TBC 2008 © All Rights Reserved

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