FORMER PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES UNITE AS BUSINESS PARTNERS
(Feb. 8, Detroit, MI) With both of their presidential ambitions dashed, Republican Mitt Romney and Democrat John Edwards announced today the formation of a new business venture. Their stated goal is to stimulate the economy in several major urban areas, create thousands of new jobs and restore hope in many areas of the country already suffering from the recession. While this bipartisan effort may appear odd at first glance, before they were politicians each of these men was a multimillionaire with a knack for making money. Romney, the former Massachusetts Governor was a corporate raider, venture capatilist-slash and burn-hostile take over-liquidation-layoff specialist who made millions as the CEO of Bain Capital.
The former North Carolina Senator, John Edwards began his career as an ambulance chasing-vulture who preyed on the misfortunate, maimed, injured, disabled, enfeebled, incontinent victims of everything from malpractice to product liabilities. Edwards entire campaign was centered on the notion that he was the champion of the working man, the downtrodden, the unheard, unwanted, unwashed, uneducated,unemployed, uninsured unsung heroes of America.
Romney, as a GOP hopeful, campaigned as the proud free market, rising-tides-lift-all-boats, can-do, problem solving, manager, troubleshooter,social, economic and moral conservative. The only things these men have in common besides being extremely wealthy, having been politicians, expert liars and each having run for president, is good hair.
At a joint press conference here today, Edwards and Romney spoke on the steps of a closed Ford factory. Romney had announced his candidacy from this spot months ago with a promise to bring jobs back to Michigan said “Friends, I told you I would bring jobs back. I keep my word. I am here today to tell you that within months anyone in Michigan who wants a good paying job will have one. They can work right here. This plant which once mass produced second rate sedans and pick ups will soon be producing shampoo, conditioners and styling gel”.
According to a press release, the new business will be called “Pander Hair and Grooming Products, Inc.” They will specialize in developing, manufacturing, distributing and marketing a wide range of hair care and other health and beauty aid products. They are financing the upstart costs with their own personal wealth but anticipate moving into profitability within a year.
With every hair on his own head well in place, Edwards commented, “We have been living in two Americas for far too long. That’s right two Americas. One for people with good hair, one for people without it. One for people who can afford a good stylist and one for those who can’t. I know what it’s like to live in both Americas. My daddy worked in a mill all his life and once a week he put a bowl on top my head and cut my hair. I remember my mother cryin’ and I remember him smackin’ the tar outta her. Right then I said to myself, I will have good hair and help other people have good hair.”
Romney, his own coif a marvel of modern synthetic chemistry continued, “John’s absolutely right. Ronald Reagan had great hair but he grew up poor and earned it. If you notice, most people have bad hair. I’m sorry, that’s a fact. That leads them towards poverty, abortion, crime, drug abuse, shoplifting, illegally immigrating and all the other things that Ronald Reagan fought against. Once our factories are up and running we will create more jobs than anyone can imagine and, everyone will look good too”.
As their press conference meandered on into total idiocy, most of the gathered crowd departed while shouting profanities or throwing snowballs and debris at Edwards and Romney. Left with no choice they sat for interviews with the press.
Romney , answering questions related to job growth and economic opportunity said, “Listen, these will be good jobs. I’m just as concerned with job growth as I am hair growth and the growth of our economy is vital to both”. Asked if he knew what he was talking about, Romney replied candidly, “Not really...I mean, not exactly...you see, I just spent over 60 million dollars of my own money running for president and I think I lost my mind along the way. I spent the last year lying, pandering, eating shitty pork chops and corn with fat, dumb Iowa farmers, kissing babies, changing positions whenever I could. Hell, I don’t even know what day it is...I actually had a wet dream last night about Candy Crowley...”, as his words trailed off into high pitched laughter. Sensing his partner was in trouble, Edwards spoke up noting. “There are Americans right now in places like this and New Orleans who have no hope, no job, no future. We will give them hope and jobs and all that stuff. We will build factories in the poorest parts of this country, pay everyone a fair, but minimum wage, allow them to buy health insurance, pay union dues, fulfill the American dream. We plan to only have our employees work a 32.5 hour work week so we won’t have to give them benefits. No. They will have plenty of time to go out and get a second job at Taco Bell or a liquor store. If they’re truly ambitious and a bit luck maybe they will stick a curling iron up their ass or swallow a crayon, get burned by scalding coffee and be able to sue. That is their right. Sue. Sueing iis the American way. Yes, we will make this one America again”.
As the reporters departed, one asked “Who will you guys support for president”? Edwards looked at Romney, they stood silent. They slowly embraced and began to weep, softly at first but, within seconds both were wailing like a lactose-intolerant toddler with a wet diaper trapped in a crib with a rabid raccoon.
Edwards and Romney are presently both resting comfortably, sedated into oblivion, at the East Lansing Psychiatric Home for the Imbecilic and Chronically Misguided.
When news of this event reached those candidates still out on the campaign trail, it was met with mixed reactions. GOP former Arkansas Governor, Mike Huckabee said, “Our Lord works in mysterious ways. I think they should both be treated in a humane, compassionate way. Especially John Edwards. I never really cared much for that heathen, pagan, polygamist Romney”.
Speaking on behalf of his wife, democratic candidate, Hillary Clinton, former president Bill Clinton commented, “Fuck them. Fuck them both. I’m sorta glad about what happened. I hope they both get electric shock therapy. Really. It worked wonders for Hillary and I know she’ll make a fine president”.
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Thursday, February 7, 2008
ROMNEY: “SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO THE BEATLES”
MITT EXITS GOP RACE
Cites Money & Mormonism For Dismal Showing
(Feb. 7 Washington, DC) After spending over $60 million of his own personal fortune, former Massachusetts Governor, republican presidential candidate, Mitt Romney announced he was “suspending” his campaign. His announcement came during a speech to the Conservative Political Action Conference here earlier. His departure alters the GOP field leaving only John McCain and Mike Huckabee seriously in the contest. Texas Congressman, Ron Paul has not collected any delegates in the caucuses and primaries held to date.
Romney began his bid for the presidency long before the majority of other contenders. His personal wealth allowed him to spend lavishly, (some would say recklessly, foolishly), in the earliest caucus and primary states of Iowa and New Hampshire. Despite his huge outlay of cash which bought him widespread advertising, top dollar consultants, media, some name recognition , his own staff of traveling hair stylists, and the Ames Straw Poll, his message, he personally, never really caught on. There were far too many questions and doubts about him and his candidacy then there was belief in his abilities and readiness to serve as commander-in-chief.
Among the core republic base composed of right wing Christian conservatives and Evangelicals, Romney’s Mormonism was always an obstacle in the way of their acceptance of him. Oddly, during a press conference hastily arranged after his speech, Romney himself commented, “Being raised a strict Mormon sheltered me from many things in my formative years. Only recently did I hear the Beatles song from 1964 entitled ‘Money Can’t Buy Me Love’, I was really taken by that concept. I thought money could buy me anything. After all, it always has. Once it bought me the Ames Straw Poll last August, my belief was it would certainly buy me the presidency”.
His immediate political future unclear, Romney said as he departed for his private jet, “ Money can’t buy me love or an election but it can buy me a boat load of other stuff. Right now I’m gonna buy a bottle of scotch, every Beatles CD I can find and two prostitutes. After that flight, who knows...I might buy myself a divorce or a Hummer.”
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Cites Money & Mormonism For Dismal Showing
(Feb. 7 Washington, DC) After spending over $60 million of his own personal fortune, former Massachusetts Governor, republican presidential candidate, Mitt Romney announced he was “suspending” his campaign. His announcement came during a speech to the Conservative Political Action Conference here earlier. His departure alters the GOP field leaving only John McCain and Mike Huckabee seriously in the contest. Texas Congressman, Ron Paul has not collected any delegates in the caucuses and primaries held to date.
Romney began his bid for the presidency long before the majority of other contenders. His personal wealth allowed him to spend lavishly, (some would say recklessly, foolishly), in the earliest caucus and primary states of Iowa and New Hampshire. Despite his huge outlay of cash which bought him widespread advertising, top dollar consultants, media, some name recognition , his own staff of traveling hair stylists, and the Ames Straw Poll, his message, he personally, never really caught on. There were far too many questions and doubts about him and his candidacy then there was belief in his abilities and readiness to serve as commander-in-chief.
Among the core republic base composed of right wing Christian conservatives and Evangelicals, Romney’s Mormonism was always an obstacle in the way of their acceptance of him. Oddly, during a press conference hastily arranged after his speech, Romney himself commented, “Being raised a strict Mormon sheltered me from many things in my formative years. Only recently did I hear the Beatles song from 1964 entitled ‘Money Can’t Buy Me Love’, I was really taken by that concept. I thought money could buy me anything. After all, it always has. Once it bought me the Ames Straw Poll last August, my belief was it would certainly buy me the presidency”.
His immediate political future unclear, Romney said as he departed for his private jet, “ Money can’t buy me love or an election but it can buy me a boat load of other stuff. Right now I’m gonna buy a bottle of scotch, every Beatles CD I can find and two prostitutes. After that flight, who knows...I might buy myself a divorce or a Hummer.”
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Friday, February 1, 2008
CHUCK, WE HARDLY KNOW YE
Oh, Chuck...
We are the most stereotyped people in the country; we are probably , also, the most observed. In every nook and cranny, town and village , from coast to coast, folks sit and watch TV programs and movies with the greatest city on the planet as the backdrop, New York, New York.
Stereotypes, as are widely acknowledged, are the direct byproduct of ignorance. Ignorance, in many incarnations can be forgiven. Stupidity, however, a variant of ignorance, cannot. Particularly, it cannot be explained nor forgiven, when it comes from the mouth of a 5 term United States Senator. This particular man, and that noun is used lightly, chose to insert himself into a debate that did not only not exist, but was so far above his god-given intellect and life experience, that it is amazing his comments even appeared in print.
But, they did.
So now, we have to discuss the republican Senator from Iowa, that’s right Iowa, Charles “Chuck” Grassley. Now, if you don’t follow politics very closely or watch C-Span around the clock, you may never have heard or seen this Alzheimic fool from the ‘fields of dreams’. If that’s the case, perhaps a brief description of our man of the moment is in order.
Chuck Grassley: an incumbent republican senator from of, all places, a state of absolutely no significance manages to be an incumbent for decades. How, you might ask, does a moronic, myopic, addled ass-wipe retain such a position.
The answer is simple. Chuck Grassley is a whore. He sucks, licks and feasts on the genitals of all sorts of huge corporations involved in agriculture. He has presided over senate committees of , at best , dubious value; more akin to lynch squads than actual governmental bodies. Chuck is a douche. He washes funds from all the conglomerated special interests into his own campaign chest and the small change goes back to Iowa in the form of pork barrel spending so they can have another ‘Butter Cow’ at their pitiful state fair.
Come to New York City someday, Chuck, before the prions eroding your tiny brain render you a drooling turnip. Actually, that would probably be justice in an odd sense. Since you have been such a staunch supporter and advocate for commercial agriculture, it is only fitting that your own senility be linked to all the nitrogen, potash, urea, RoundUp, Atrazine, Tordon, Canopy, Magnum Plus and other petrochemicals you and your asshole cohorts so liberally spray across your fields. How many toes do your grandchildren have, Chuck?
There was no reason to get this angry until you stepped into turf that your bumpkin ass should never have seen. You, Chuck, were one of the few enormously ignorant, arrogant, small-minded senators who thought Homeland Security funding should be allocated the same as federal highway funds. You dick. You scumbag. You pompous idiot! How dare you think Iowa or any other fucking “Cornbelt” state has anywhere near the risk level as the major metropolitan centers in this country. For that alone you, you old wrinkled fucker, should rot in hell. If not hell, you should spend about 70,000 years in Purgatory thinking about your terrible errors in judgment.
We are all glad you thought about us Chuck. We never heard of you but now, that we know who you are and who you represent; all bets are off. Not even the Jews will donate campaign funds anymore. You better not run for reelection. You will be spanked.
Mr. Grassley, your state is a barren wasteland populated by minimally functional dirt bags. Your state is the manure capital of the world and you, sir, are the king of it all.
From the good and kind people of New York City, the number one tourist destination on the planet, from the safest large city in America, from the capital of entertainment, finance, commerce and intelligence, we give you a fine and hardy Bronx Cheer: Fuck You, Chuck. Fuck You and everyone you have ever known, loved or spoken to. Fuck you and your relatives, pets, livestock, lobbyists and staffers. Fuck you, Chuck. Drink some ethanol...let’s see how that works out for you. You are a disgrace to the senate, (which isn’t saying much) to middle America (which is saying less) and to morons around the world.
Chuck, at 74 years of age it’s safe to say you are closer to the end than you are to the beginning. For your many sins, Chuck, you may have to spend eternity in Jersey...oops, that would be like a day at the beach...The Good Lord will keep your sorry soul restless, drifting in the swirling winds of that place that sucks the marrow from your bones...Iowa.
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
We are the most stereotyped people in the country; we are probably , also, the most observed. In every nook and cranny, town and village , from coast to coast, folks sit and watch TV programs and movies with the greatest city on the planet as the backdrop, New York, New York.
Stereotypes, as are widely acknowledged, are the direct byproduct of ignorance. Ignorance, in many incarnations can be forgiven. Stupidity, however, a variant of ignorance, cannot. Particularly, it cannot be explained nor forgiven, when it comes from the mouth of a 5 term United States Senator. This particular man, and that noun is used lightly, chose to insert himself into a debate that did not only not exist, but was so far above his god-given intellect and life experience, that it is amazing his comments even appeared in print.
But, they did.
So now, we have to discuss the republican Senator from Iowa, that’s right Iowa, Charles “Chuck” Grassley. Now, if you don’t follow politics very closely or watch C-Span around the clock, you may never have heard or seen this Alzheimic fool from the ‘fields of dreams’. If that’s the case, perhaps a brief description of our man of the moment is in order.
Chuck Grassley: an incumbent republican senator from of, all places, a state of absolutely no significance manages to be an incumbent for decades. How, you might ask, does a moronic, myopic, addled ass-wipe retain such a position.
The answer is simple. Chuck Grassley is a whore. He sucks, licks and feasts on the genitals of all sorts of huge corporations involved in agriculture. He has presided over senate committees of , at best , dubious value; more akin to lynch squads than actual governmental bodies. Chuck is a douche. He washes funds from all the conglomerated special interests into his own campaign chest and the small change goes back to Iowa in the form of pork barrel spending so they can have another ‘Butter Cow’ at their pitiful state fair.
Come to New York City someday, Chuck, before the prions eroding your tiny brain render you a drooling turnip. Actually, that would probably be justice in an odd sense. Since you have been such a staunch supporter and advocate for commercial agriculture, it is only fitting that your own senility be linked to all the nitrogen, potash, urea, RoundUp, Atrazine, Tordon, Canopy, Magnum Plus and other petrochemicals you and your asshole cohorts so liberally spray across your fields. How many toes do your grandchildren have, Chuck?
There was no reason to get this angry until you stepped into turf that your bumpkin ass should never have seen. You, Chuck, were one of the few enormously ignorant, arrogant, small-minded senators who thought Homeland Security funding should be allocated the same as federal highway funds. You dick. You scumbag. You pompous idiot! How dare you think Iowa or any other fucking “Cornbelt” state has anywhere near the risk level as the major metropolitan centers in this country. For that alone you, you old wrinkled fucker, should rot in hell. If not hell, you should spend about 70,000 years in Purgatory thinking about your terrible errors in judgment.
We are all glad you thought about us Chuck. We never heard of you but now, that we know who you are and who you represent; all bets are off. Not even the Jews will donate campaign funds anymore. You better not run for reelection. You will be spanked.
Mr. Grassley, your state is a barren wasteland populated by minimally functional dirt bags. Your state is the manure capital of the world and you, sir, are the king of it all.
From the good and kind people of New York City, the number one tourist destination on the planet, from the safest large city in America, from the capital of entertainment, finance, commerce and intelligence, we give you a fine and hardy Bronx Cheer: Fuck You, Chuck. Fuck You and everyone you have ever known, loved or spoken to. Fuck you and your relatives, pets, livestock, lobbyists and staffers. Fuck you, Chuck. Drink some ethanol...let’s see how that works out for you. You are a disgrace to the senate, (which isn’t saying much) to middle America (which is saying less) and to morons around the world.
Chuck, at 74 years of age it’s safe to say you are closer to the end than you are to the beginning. For your many sins, Chuck, you may have to spend eternity in Jersey...oops, that would be like a day at the beach...The Good Lord will keep your sorry soul restless, drifting in the swirling winds of that place that sucks the marrow from your bones...Iowa.
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Thursday, January 31, 2008
IOWA SENATOR SHOWS OFF LACK OF BRAINS
(Jan. 31 New York, New York) Every now and then you hear something that stops you in your tracks; something that is so beyond understanding or reason that you can do no more than shake your head in amazement. Often, politicians are the source for some of the most outrageous, idiotic, asinine, irrelevant comments. The latest in the long list of buffoons who were somehow voted into office several decades ago and have remained in office is Chuck Grassley, the “Iowa Intellect”, republican senator and all around jerk off.
Mr. Grassley, who loves to hear the sound of his own nasal twang on the radio and TV, never one to run from a camera, thrust himself into controversy with his comments regarding the failed presidential run of former NYC Mayor, Rudy Giuliani. To ask “what was he thinking?” would be to imply that he is capable of thought. Chuck Grassley, incumbent senior senator from, of all the godforsaken places, Iowa, had the gall to criticize New Yorker’s and our ‘personalities’. That’s odd, Chuck, because the only living entities in your state with personality are hogs and fat cows.
Senator Grassley, a man who has been bought and paid for by the big agribusiness conglomerates that rule rural America, the multinational pharmaceutical firms that make seed, fertilizer and have old Chuck living in their hip pockets. Chuck Grassley who never saw a subsidy he didn’t vote for and actual receive. This scumbag, imbecilic, dimwitted, inbred, waste of a carcass, just decades out of the outhouse, actually said things about a place and a people he knows absolutely nothing about. But, then again, one of the surest hallmarks of a true idiot is their ability to speak about anything without knowing anything.
Iowa, a fertile land with soil and groundwater contaminated from decades of fertilizers, chemicals and manure run offs all for the benefit of our heroic “family farmers.” That term alone is archaic; today’s farmers are hugely subsidized businessmen who happened to inherit land from Pa and Grandpa. Without the federal government, the American taxpayer, supporting them, they would not survive a year. These obese, barely literate, small minded, greedy schmoes are the biggest welfare recipients in the history of America. Oh, but don’t tell them that. No sireee. They see themselves as the salt of the earth, as honest, decent, hardworking folks providing cheap food for the world by their labors. Horse shit. These guys are corn and bean growers. Very little of their crop goes into food products that we eat; it goes into feed for livestock, industrial usages galore and now, the latest rage – ethanol. The best kept secret in the country today is that the American citizen literally supports farmers and farming in America. If they had to fend for themselves in a free market, without all the deals, loans, subsidies, crop insurance, fertilizer-chemical-seed company rebates, they wouldn’t be able to compete, let alone live the way they do.
And make no mistake about it; they live large, thanks to you, me and Uncle Sam. They work, tops, 12 weeks a year: six for planting, six for harvesting. What do they do the rest of the time? Eat, bullshit, eat, lie to each other, boink each others wives and daughters, eat some more, drink some more, collect government handouts, eat, check the mail box for the next subsidy check, drink some more, complain about how hard they have it, put up another mailbox so they can receive more government checks, drive around in expensive pick-ups, gossiping about their neighbors, figure out other ways to get more handouts, drink, fart, belch and think they are so much better than the rest of the country especially those poor fools who live in New York City or Los Angeles. What a sorry bunch of turds these folks are. They are Chuck Grassley’s constituency…they deserve each other.
But, once Chuck decides to stick his farmers shit-covered boot into his trash talking mouth, well, then it’s time to lay it all out. Iowa sucks. Iowans suck. Farmers are welfare cheats, lazy, greedy, slugs with their hands out. That’s it. Chuck, just take your bribes, let your asshole neighbors think you’re God and fuck off. God Bless you. Have a nice day.
A Faccia De Morte
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Mr. Grassley, who loves to hear the sound of his own nasal twang on the radio and TV, never one to run from a camera, thrust himself into controversy with his comments regarding the failed presidential run of former NYC Mayor, Rudy Giuliani. To ask “what was he thinking?” would be to imply that he is capable of thought. Chuck Grassley, incumbent senior senator from, of all the godforsaken places, Iowa, had the gall to criticize New Yorker’s and our ‘personalities’. That’s odd, Chuck, because the only living entities in your state with personality are hogs and fat cows.
Senator Grassley, a man who has been bought and paid for by the big agribusiness conglomerates that rule rural America, the multinational pharmaceutical firms that make seed, fertilizer and have old Chuck living in their hip pockets. Chuck Grassley who never saw a subsidy he didn’t vote for and actual receive. This scumbag, imbecilic, dimwitted, inbred, waste of a carcass, just decades out of the outhouse, actually said things about a place and a people he knows absolutely nothing about. But, then again, one of the surest hallmarks of a true idiot is their ability to speak about anything without knowing anything.
Iowa, a fertile land with soil and groundwater contaminated from decades of fertilizers, chemicals and manure run offs all for the benefit of our heroic “family farmers.” That term alone is archaic; today’s farmers are hugely subsidized businessmen who happened to inherit land from Pa and Grandpa. Without the federal government, the American taxpayer, supporting them, they would not survive a year. These obese, barely literate, small minded, greedy schmoes are the biggest welfare recipients in the history of America. Oh, but don’t tell them that. No sireee. They see themselves as the salt of the earth, as honest, decent, hardworking folks providing cheap food for the world by their labors. Horse shit. These guys are corn and bean growers. Very little of their crop goes into food products that we eat; it goes into feed for livestock, industrial usages galore and now, the latest rage – ethanol. The best kept secret in the country today is that the American citizen literally supports farmers and farming in America. If they had to fend for themselves in a free market, without all the deals, loans, subsidies, crop insurance, fertilizer-chemical-seed company rebates, they wouldn’t be able to compete, let alone live the way they do.
And make no mistake about it; they live large, thanks to you, me and Uncle Sam. They work, tops, 12 weeks a year: six for planting, six for harvesting. What do they do the rest of the time? Eat, bullshit, eat, lie to each other, boink each others wives and daughters, eat some more, drink some more, collect government handouts, eat, check the mail box for the next subsidy check, drink some more, complain about how hard they have it, put up another mailbox so they can receive more government checks, drive around in expensive pick-ups, gossiping about their neighbors, figure out other ways to get more handouts, drink, fart, belch and think they are so much better than the rest of the country especially those poor fools who live in New York City or Los Angeles. What a sorry bunch of turds these folks are. They are Chuck Grassley’s constituency…they deserve each other.
But, once Chuck decides to stick his farmers shit-covered boot into his trash talking mouth, well, then it’s time to lay it all out. Iowa sucks. Iowans suck. Farmers are welfare cheats, lazy, greedy, slugs with their hands out. That’s it. Chuck, just take your bribes, let your asshole neighbors think you’re God and fuck off. God Bless you. Have a nice day.
A Faccia De Morte
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
NY GIANTS: REDEMPTION & MATURITY
(Bronx, NYC) A FAN'S THOUGHTS
Patience have been exercised, restraint as well. Deep breaths and steps back have been taken. Moments to reflect have elapsed. Perspective has been sought, found and kept. Powder has been kept dry. This silence, at first, was the result of shock; something akin to the catatonic state a victim of extreme emotional overload may lapse into. Once the pseudo-catatonia subsided, the silence was a form of pride. It was the highroad taken; it would have been so much easier to gloat. Most would have. We didn’t.
Each contest leading towards the Conference Championship was an underdogs struggle to disprove common knowledge. For the faithful, every one of those games was an experience in daring to hope, not just for a victory but, ultimately for exorcism. Too many ghosts roamed the arena; too many memories haunted those who had rooted for this particular team, this once storied franchise, this often hapless squad of no-names and a handful of big names who simply couldn’t deliver.
How many times had certain victory somehow, clumsily, often stupidly, eluded this team during the last few seasons? How many times was the “player who will take us to the next level” wheeled off the field on a little John Deere cart only to disappear into the tunnel beneath the stadium never to return to fulfill that promise, his dreams,and our hopes?
Then there were all the betrayals. Money became the only force that inspired loyalty. Free agency sucked away potential headliners and coaches followed their own greed under the auspices of taking on “new challenges” only to demonstrate success while pacing on an opposing sideline. Still, there was the faithful. Despite it all, there are those whose loyalty is pure, loyalty steeped in family and personal history, loyalty that is generational, passed on and down.
Finally, something happened. It was the result of cumulative factors both tangible and intangible, as much individual as collective. On Sunday January 20, 2008, the planets and other celestial bodies aligned, for four frozen hours the elements were rendered irrelevant, Mother Nature herself was knocked out of the way because there was business to be done and, by God, these men were going to do it.
Sports, particularly football, have long been utilized metaphorically to illustrate aspects of life: the values of teamwork and collective purpose, discipline, dedication as well as characteristics of competitors that represent the best in us physically and mentally. Football lends itself to metaphor and analogy; from the comic to the overblown, football is not a microcosm of life. It is a unique game and, at the professional level played by some of the most superior athletes on the planet. It is exciting and emotional and many other things but it is, essentially, a game.
Fans can read into it or take out of it whatever they chose. Cities with professional football franchises either embrace and support or vilify the home team: that is their prerogative. But, don’t think anyone from another place could utter derogatory sentiments about the home team. I can discipline and criticize my kid but don’t you dare say an ill word about her or your ass will be kicked. It’s a family thing; just like the home team comes to be part of the extended family for the faithful, the diehards, certainly not the fair weather types.
The New York Giants are in the Super Bowl. That is a fact. How they arrived there while 30 other teams failed to reach that goal, is a story of a season when a team grew up. Watching that maturity, for those attuned to its presence was rewarding and made up for many disappointments. Perhaps that is the other universal use of football as metaphor; there is always that inherent element, the chance, no matter how remote, for redemption. Individuals redeem themselves on the field as do entire teams. Redemption. Maybe that is too religious sounding a word to use here; perhaps it is hyperbolic and blasphemous. What the hell! The New York Giants are in the Super Bowl.
NOTE: Since Lou is a valued contributor, long time friend, and true blue Giants fan, we allowed him this philosophical post. It may never happen again. Beware - if the Giants win...? Who knows?
Copyright © 2008 TBC All Rights Reserved
Copyright © 2008 BronxWest Consulting
Patience have been exercised, restraint as well. Deep breaths and steps back have been taken. Moments to reflect have elapsed. Perspective has been sought, found and kept. Powder has been kept dry. This silence, at first, was the result of shock; something akin to the catatonic state a victim of extreme emotional overload may lapse into. Once the pseudo-catatonia subsided, the silence was a form of pride. It was the highroad taken; it would have been so much easier to gloat. Most would have. We didn’t.
Each contest leading towards the Conference Championship was an underdogs struggle to disprove common knowledge. For the faithful, every one of those games was an experience in daring to hope, not just for a victory but, ultimately for exorcism. Too many ghosts roamed the arena; too many memories haunted those who had rooted for this particular team, this once storied franchise, this often hapless squad of no-names and a handful of big names who simply couldn’t deliver.
How many times had certain victory somehow, clumsily, often stupidly, eluded this team during the last few seasons? How many times was the “player who will take us to the next level” wheeled off the field on a little John Deere cart only to disappear into the tunnel beneath the stadium never to return to fulfill that promise, his dreams,and our hopes?
Then there were all the betrayals. Money became the only force that inspired loyalty. Free agency sucked away potential headliners and coaches followed their own greed under the auspices of taking on “new challenges” only to demonstrate success while pacing on an opposing sideline. Still, there was the faithful. Despite it all, there are those whose loyalty is pure, loyalty steeped in family and personal history, loyalty that is generational, passed on and down.
Finally, something happened. It was the result of cumulative factors both tangible and intangible, as much individual as collective. On Sunday January 20, 2008, the planets and other celestial bodies aligned, for four frozen hours the elements were rendered irrelevant, Mother Nature herself was knocked out of the way because there was business to be done and, by God, these men were going to do it.
Sports, particularly football, have long been utilized metaphorically to illustrate aspects of life: the values of teamwork and collective purpose, discipline, dedication as well as characteristics of competitors that represent the best in us physically and mentally. Football lends itself to metaphor and analogy; from the comic to the overblown, football is not a microcosm of life. It is a unique game and, at the professional level played by some of the most superior athletes on the planet. It is exciting and emotional and many other things but it is, essentially, a game.
Fans can read into it or take out of it whatever they chose. Cities with professional football franchises either embrace and support or vilify the home team: that is their prerogative. But, don’t think anyone from another place could utter derogatory sentiments about the home team. I can discipline and criticize my kid but don’t you dare say an ill word about her or your ass will be kicked. It’s a family thing; just like the home team comes to be part of the extended family for the faithful, the diehards, certainly not the fair weather types.
The New York Giants are in the Super Bowl. That is a fact. How they arrived there while 30 other teams failed to reach that goal, is a story of a season when a team grew up. Watching that maturity, for those attuned to its presence was rewarding and made up for many disappointments. Perhaps that is the other universal use of football as metaphor; there is always that inherent element, the chance, no matter how remote, for redemption. Individuals redeem themselves on the field as do entire teams. Redemption. Maybe that is too religious sounding a word to use here; perhaps it is hyperbolic and blasphemous. What the hell! The New York Giants are in the Super Bowl.
NOTE: Since Lou is a valued contributor, long time friend, and true blue Giants fan, we allowed him this philosophical post. It may never happen again. Beware - if the Giants win...? Who knows?
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